Black Entitled Woman (BEW)

When we speak about entitlement: the belief that one is inherently more deserving of privileges or special treatment, it is not in the most positive manner. People hurl the term “entitled” as an insult, usually. 

  • S/he works for nothing. Everything just falls in her/his lap
  • Who does s/he think they are? Walking in as if they own the place?
  • This person has the upper hand hand is associated with having “more”
  • I don’t owe her/him an explanation, s/he’s not my boss
  • S/he speaks on everything, even when it doesn’t pertain to her/him
  • S/he doesn’t have to interview for the position, it’s theirs

In all cases, the person we are talking about seems like the bad guy because they seem to command the room, respect, etc., but are they really entitled to it? What makes a person entitled? Birthright? Race? Wealth? Social status?

When I speak about entitlement. Black women don’t usually come up in the conversation. I conducted a bit of market research, and a Black man suggested the title was an oxymoron. We black women aren’t entitled to anything but the negativity that people bestow on us, but I’d like to take a different spin on entitlement, and how you think of me. And here’s what I’m entitled to:

  • Love, pure and simple
  • Respect
  • Accepted as I present myself, and not how you define Black women. 
    • Individuality
  • Fairness
  • Kindness

And comfort. A new friend suggested that she is entitled to comfort and I agree. I was initially  shamed for sneaking out at lunch for a mani/pedi and eating lunch in my office. Even then I thought, “whatever! I will spend my time as I will!” Other managers joined me on my excursions, and why not?

Yes. I am entitled to all of these things and more, as we all are. I am reclaiming my entitlement. There is no intention to hurt anyone or take away from anyone, and aren’t we ALL entitled to these few and basic things? I’m here to start the conversation and change the narrative! Let’s go!